In all my pre-baby reading, I intentionally skipped over any and all sections on postpartum depression and baby blues in an effort to keep those feelings far from me. I was afraid I wouldn’t bond with baby or feel that intense love from the get-go, and being the planner I am, I figured if I didn’t read about it or plan for it, it wouldn’t happen. Well, I was lucky to have escaped any depression postpartum, but the baby blues took over. From day one in the hospital to a good 4 months later, I often found myself bawling, sometimes multiple times a day. But it wasn’t out of sadness or confusion, but out of love and admiration for this little baby boy that we had created. Seeing him in our home and in our arms brought such intense levels of happiness and love that I can’t explain it. Later I realized that many, if not the majority, of women experience some level of baby blues. Understanding that it is normal made it much easier to accept it as the emotions and tears came and went.
Best Baby Shower Gifts
- Quiet door closer—a good friend of mine made one of these for me and it’s one of those little things new moms don’t often think about but is a helpful, nice-to-have item.
- Any item another new mom loved—as a new mom, it’s hard to know which items, brands, or products are life-savers. It’s nice to learn from other new moms who have already done the researching and experimenting. I loved gifts that other new moms loved—like the Boppy lounger, velcro swaddle, white noise machines, or anything a new mom couldn’t live without.
- Necessary items for 6+ months—a new mom may not remember to add registry items for when baby is older, so it is nice to give mom a few necessary things for when baby is older—such as feeding spoons, teething toys, bath toys, toothpaste
- So-called “embarrassing” gifts—this depends on the new mom and your relationship with her, but I think it’s fun to give the new mom “funny” gifts—like anything breast-related (nursing pillow, nursing pads, nipple cream, pumping bra), dirty diaper related (pee-pee tee-pees or changing pad liners), or “down there” items (panty popsicles! or maxi pads)
- Practical gifts—many people like to buy the “cute” items, but the practical items are perhaps used and liked even more—such as a diaper genie, diapers, wipes, travel diaper wipes pouch, nursing tank, burp clothes, and baby wash
- Books—this one may seem boring and I have to admit every book I received made my eyes roll, but a few months after Parker was born I had read every book we owned at least 5 times and it got boring.
Current Obsessions at 3-4 Months
- Keeping Parker off the back of his head—At 3 months is when we started to see Parker’s head getting a bit flatter, so we kept him off of the back of his head during every waking moment. This month we really focused on keeping him upright with these current obsessions:
- Bumbo
- Activity Gym
- Door Hanging Jumper
- Donut Pillows—We got the Babymoov Lovenest pillow for Parker’s changing table and the Boppy Noggin Nest car seat pillow.
- Drool Bibs!—Right at three months, Parker started drooling so much! I love Aden & Anais bandana drool bibs over Cotton Pearl because A&A bibs are made of muslin and capture the drool much better than cotton.
The Baby Name Game: To Tell Or Not To Tell
In a phrase—Do Not Tell. While everyone has an opinion, most of them will be positive but damn the one or two who don’t react or reply as you wished. They can quickly kick your favorite name out of your top 10. Everyone will know or have known someone with the names on your list and they relationship with that name should not and does not need to impact your decision. Jason and I are indecisive people and we thought we would appreciate our family and friends opinions. In hindsight, we didn’t need any of their input. It was our decision and only ours to be made.
The NBD Poop: Pooping During Labor
I was a little nervous for “the poop,” mainly because my husband would be right up in there to see it. When I asked the nurse if it’s common to poop while pushing the baby out, she said that 90% of ladies poop while pushing, and if you’re not pooping, you aren’t pushing right. So yes, I pooped, and yes, my husband saw it…While pushing, I asked the nurse if I’d pooped, and she said just a little. Honestly, I cared 0% at that moment—my baby was about to be here. And when I later asked my husband about it, he said it didn’t bother him one bit, and also that the nurse wiped it away quicker than ever. So—the NBD poop—I and the other 90% of women must be good pushers!
Parker Rolls Over!
Today, exactly on Parker’s three month birthday, he rolled over from front to back! I was at my bathroom sink getting ready for the day while Parker laid at my feet on the rug…and then he rolled from his tummy to back! I was so happy that I cried tears of joy and said “I’m so happy I’m here to see this!” I was so worried I would miss some of Parker’s big moments, and as this was one of his firsts, I’m so thankful I witnessed it. He’s early to roll, but it’s no surprise because of how much he hates tummy time!
Panty Popsicles! Must-Have After Delivery
Most pregnant women have likely had the words “panty popsicle” whispered to them at some point during their pregnancy—and for good reason. A panty popsicle is a maxi pad with witch hazel on it which has been stored in the freezer. No woman knows the pain down there unless you’ve miraculously pushed a baby out, and the frozen panty popsicle greatly soothed my “area.” My hospital gave me round witch hazel pads to place on the maxi pad. When these ran out I purchased witch hazel wipes from CVS and after that I purchased the liquid witch hazel. I found the liquid witch hazel to be better than the pads because I could pre-”make” many panty popsicles and put them in the freezer, allowing me to easily grab one and use it. The witch hazel pads just added one more step in the bathroom and they weren’t cold. It also was easy for me because our freezer is just down the hall from our master bath so it wasn’t hard for me to walk over to the kitchen. I used the panty popsicles for a good 5-6 weeks after delivery—LOVE this creative invention!
Current Obsessions at 2 Months
- Boppy Newborn Lounger—Whether at home or when visiting family, the Boppy Lounger has been the greatest lounging spot for Parker. It’s slightly elevated so he can look around and it’s super comfy for him!
- Oball Classic Ball—Parker loves grabbing on to this little ball and it helps him exercise his ability to grab!
- Glider & Crib—At 2-2.5 months I started placing Parker in his crib for daytime naps and after he first woke from the rock-n-play in our room. I love that our glider is so comfy for late night feeds.
- Ergobaby Carrier with Infant Insert—This carrier is super comfy and I use it mostly for hikes or when bringing Parker into the grocery store (when I don’t have him in his car seat in the grocery cart).
- BOB Jogger—We love getting out of the house for walks.
- Rock n Play—Still Parker’s favorite place to sleep and where he will sleep the longest.
- 4Moms Mamaroo—At first Parker wasn’t a fan, but lately he enjoys relaxing in it and even puts him to sleep!
The NBD Spit-Up
Everybody tells you the baby will spit up and to have burp clothes on hand. What no one tells you is how pleasant it seems for the baby to actually spit up. We will be sitting there playing, giggling, having a ball, and then all of the sudden—holy massive spit up of all spit up! Then right back to happy-go-lucky baby play. It gets me every time how pleasant spitting up is for the little guy…[pic of pleasant, massive spit-up!].
Newborn Photos
I’m so thankful we had our newborn photos taken during the first two weeks of little guy’s birth. He was still in that newborn sleep state and had no problem staying asleep during his very first photoshoot! The photographer,Jane D Photography, was recommended by our friends. We tried to booked her a month or two in advance and she already had a booked schedule! Luckily, she placed “holds” on two dates for us and we would pick the date depending on when baby was born. She checked in a week before baby’s due date to see how our progress was going. We ended up having Parker’s photo shoot about two weeks after Parker’s birth and it was perfect! He stayed asleep the entire time and was an excellent little model. This was the first day Jason and I really got dressed and ready, and it felt good, even though it was stressful to make sure we were ready on time! I’m happy we had the photoshoot so early because he still had that sleepy, eyes closed look and Jane captured our nursery, bedroom and little Parker in his tiniest state 🙂
My Birth Story & Timeline
The weeks leading up to my due date, I was only 1-1.5cm dilated and did not experience any sign of baby “dropping.” I did notice the mucus plug about 3 weeks before my due date. I went on long walks (2-5 miles) to try to get the baby to move south. On my due date, October 4th, my mom and I walked around the Irvine Spectrum for a couple hours. She felt my belly at one point when I thought I felt a really hard area on my belly. While I didn’t know it at the time, I think these may have been Braxton Hicks. That night, Jason and I went to Chipotle 🙂 There was a nurse there who asked when I was due and said she thought I still had more time before baby’s arrival!
At around 10:15pm that night, Jason and I were watching TV and about to head to bed when I felt a crackling noise in my lower belly. I shot Jason a shocked look and quickly jumped off the couch in case my water was breaking. I told Jason “I think my water just broke!” and ran to the bathroom. There was only a tiny bit of water that came out initially. I then called my OB who said it is likely that my water just broke, advised me to have a snack, and then make my way over to the hospital. Even though I had just showered, I hopped back in the shower to shave my legs :). About 10-15 minutes after my water broke, I felt the first contraction, and then another about 10-15 minutes after that. We called my mom and let her know we were heading to the hospital. She jumped out of bed and made her way to the hospital too!
It was about 11:45pm when we got to the hospital. Jason and I held hands as we walked it. It felt like we were about to check into a hotel for vacation! I wasn’t in any pain at the time. We were admitted to a triage room where I changed into a gown, was hooked up to the monitors, and was assessed and told I was about 2cm dilated. This is when water really started to flow and I could really start to feel the contractions…My mom came in to say hello and then went back to sleep in the waiting room. She’s the best!
There weren’t any labor and delivery rooms available, so we spent the next 7 hours in the triage room trying to relax, get some rest, and manage the pain. After a few hours in the triage room, the contractions started to get stronger and the pain was getting worse. I tried walking around and deep breathing. I threw up once here because of the pain. At around 4am I was given an IV pain killer which only helped a tiny bit but made me drowsy so I was able to doze off in between contractions.
At around 7am we were finally able to make it to a labor and delivery room. I had a hard time walking and had to pause as the contractions came. Once in the L&D room, I was assessed to be about 5.5cm dilated. We had to wait for the anesthesiologist to become available to give me the epidural. I WAS IN A LOT OF PAIN NOW, and threw up again!!! The poor nurse was trying to get him to hurry to us and had me sat up and prepared for when he came in. Once he finally arrived, I sat holding on to Jason as the anesthesiologist quickly repeated the medical speel required before administering the epidural. He didn’t make it through the whole process because he knew I greatly needed that pain relief! The first needle was not inserted in the right place so he had to try again. I don’t remember if the epidural needle was painful because I was nearly shaking from the labor pains. Luckily, this worked and the nurse later told me she was afraid the epidural wasn’t going to work on me. I remember thinking, “If this epidural doesn’t work, please put me to sleep and cut me open to get this baby out!” It took a good 20-30 minutes before the epidural took effect and when it did, I felt like I could breath again and was SOOO thankful for modern day medicine!
The epidural really slowed down the labor process for me. We spent the next 10-12 hours trying to rest and getting assessed every few hours to see how I was progressing. I was given Pitocin to help move the labor on. I threw up again…The nurses discovered the baby was “sunny side up” and put a jelly bean ball between my legs and positioned me in a way to turn the baby’s head down (it didn’t work!). One nurse said there is a chance of a C-section since Parker was face-up. My mom, dad and sister also came by the room to see how I was doing. I wasn’t in much labor pain at this time but tired from a painful, long night! I also was having bad acid reflux and the “labor shakes” which made my whole body tremble.
At around 8:15pm, I reached 10cm dilated and was told we would now start pushing. Both my mom and sister made their way up to the room to be there for the birth. The nurse instructed me how to push while Jason counted to 10 three times. After the first round of pushing I thought, “This is going to be easy!” and was told I was an excellent pusher 🙂
After 30 minutes of pushing during the contractions, I began to feel pain in my lower back and my family noticed the epidural bag had run out. The nurse went to find the anesthesiologist to refill the bag but he was busy in a C-section with twins. The pain got worse, really quickly and now I was experiencing what a “movie labor” is like, with the pain, moaning, and cringing. I was also having the WORST acid reflux and felt like my throat was on fire. At one point I was unable to push because the pain was so bad and I was crying. Because baby was sunny-side-up, he was pushing on my lower back which might actually have been more painful than the contractions (both of which I was able to feel completely now). Parker’s heart rate would drop slightly while pushing, so we had to pause at times. I was given an oxygen mask for additional air and a wet cloth for my forehead.
The doctor came in twice to see how close the baby was, and when I was finally close enough (and in so much pain), she stayed. To hurry the delivery along and because Parker was face-up, they decided to use a vacuum to help get Parker out. I wasn’t sure if this was a good or bad thing, but at this point I didn’t care. I just wanted that baby OUT of me and the pain to be gone! I kept my eyes closed most of the time and was gripping onto the bed. The anesthesiologist finally came in and refilled the epidural bag when I had about 5 minutes left of pushing, so it was zero help! Finally, after 1.5hrs of pushing, Parker was born and placed directly on my bare chest. I cried tears of joy that he was finally here and that the pain was now over!
Throughout the pregnancy I of course knew there was a baby growing in my belly, but nothing makes it as real as when he actually came out and was placed in my arms. I grabbed onto him while he snuggled up in my neck and I looked him up and down to see that he was real! I am so thankful my mom and sister were there for support and also to take the best videos and photos I will ever have.
While I was getting stitched up (two tears), everyone left the room except one nurse and Jason and I got to take in our precious baby during the Golden Hour. I wasn’t in any more pain and enjoyed this quiet time with our new family member. I remember feeling his breath on my neck and finally being able to say something, and said “We’ve been waiting for you.” I tried to breastfeed but Parker wasn’t yet sure how to latch. While Jason held him for the first time, I enjoyed my first meal in over 24 hours, a turkey sandwich 🙂
After the Golden Hour, my mom and sister came back in to meet Parker. We were told I may have to spend the night in the L&D room because the recovery rooms were full. After about an hour, a room opened up (at midnight?) and we were wheeled into the recovery room, where we would spend the next 2 days/nights learning how to care for Parker and getting to know him.
This was the best, craziest, coolest day and one I will never, ever forget!
On our way to the recovery room
Mom and Nicki in waiting room!
Here we go, up to L&D!
Things No One Ever Tells You About Pregnancy
There are a lot of crazy things your body does while you are pregnant—other than growing an entire human being in your stomach. I’m still trying to understand how it happened! Many of the things I experiences I didn’t find on other “5 crazy things that happen to your body while pregnant” articles—and believe me I researched more than I should have on this topic. There were always the obvious ones, like pregnancy acne, having to go pee every 2-3 hours, and ligament pain. Here are a few weird things that my body did while I was pregnant:
- Acid reflux. And it doesn’t only happen because baby is taking up room, thus pushing acid up your esophagus, but because your sphincter loosens during pregnancy, causing acid to reflux back up.
- Puffy everything. It wasn’t just my cheeks, butt, fingers, and toes, but everything got puffy, including my va-jay-jay and nips.
- Fluids. Making their way out of my nose from being stuffed up all the time, to my va-jay-jay…I guess the body is prepping for delivery. While I thought I’d never be wearing pads while pregnant, I thought wrong.
- Crazy dreams. Pregnancy brings on the most detailed, vivid dreams. My sister once shared one with a movie producer friend because it was so fascinating.
- Achy fingers. I got a glimpse into what arthritis will feel like later in life. Every morning I’d wake up with achy fingers.
Mommy & Munchkin 